Communication
It may seem obvious, but being able to properly communicate with your mate is something that a shocking percentage of people fail to do appropriately. When disagreeing, take the time to really hear what the other person has to say. Be sure to use “I” statements rather than “you” statements. For example: instead of saying “you always drink too much beer” you can soften the blow by saying something like “I feel like your beer drinking is too much.” If you take the time to consider the other person’s perspective, the disagreements you might have will be much less volatile. Never underestimate the value of displaying empathy.
Romance
Try to never forget that you are in fact in a romantic relationship. Small acts count. Chivalry counts. Courtesy counts. Any little thing you can think of to romance your mate will go a long way in maintaining the state of the relationship. No reason hugs and kisses. Compliments. Go out of your way to do something nice. Putting a smile on the face of your mate will inevitably put a smile on yours.
Spacing
Even something as seemingly safe as water can kill us if we drink too much of it. Relationships are the same. Your mate appreciates being able to share what they did during the day and how their day went, but if you are calling 15 times in an hour then you may want to have a stress pill and think things over. Find what types of things work with your mate and how much. If you can’t figure it out on your own, don’t be afraid to simply ask. Your mate will appreciate that you have an interest in keeping up a good relationship.
It may seem obvious, but being able to properly communicate with your mate is something that a shocking percentage of people fail to do appropriately. When disagreeing, take the time to really hear what the other person has to say. Be sure to use “I” statements rather than “you” statements. For example: instead of saying “you always drink too much beer” you can soften the blow by saying something like “I feel like your beer drinking is too much.” If you take the time to consider the other person’s perspective, the disagreements you might have will be much less volatile. Never underestimate the value of displaying empathy.
Romance
Try to never forget that you are in fact in a romantic relationship. Small acts count. Chivalry counts. Courtesy counts. Any little thing you can think of to romance your mate will go a long way in maintaining the state of the relationship. No reason hugs and kisses. Compliments. Go out of your way to do something nice. Putting a smile on the face of your mate will inevitably put a smile on yours.
Spacing
Even something as seemingly safe as water can kill us if we drink too much of it. Relationships are the same. Your mate appreciates being able to share what they did during the day and how their day went, but if you are calling 15 times in an hour then you may want to have a stress pill and think things over. Find what types of things work with your mate and how much. If you can’t figure it out on your own, don’t be afraid to simply ask. Your mate will appreciate that you have an interest in keeping up a good relationship.
Chase Chick MPA LPC is CEO and co-founder of Beyond the Gray Sky, whose brands include Pursuit of Happiness, Dallas Psychology Review, and Luxe Media Productions.
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